I feel like some kind of shadow, Another slave to the week

contraclub:

sorry but that unfollow will cost you $5

"Right, so…so if you’re going to do this then… you’re just gonna have to take me with you".

deaneggsandsam:

adult: “do u know what college you want to go to yet?”

me: [sweats nervously] MONSTERS UNIVERSITY

itssexualhour:

when i was in 2nd grade this nice asian lady gave me a cucumber from her garden when we were looking for a house. i was so excited that i brought it to school to show my friends, and this one kid dared me to ‘have sex’ with it. i didnt know what that was at the time, so he explained to me that its when people go under the sheets and kiss, so i willingly accepted his dare and had sex with an organic cucumber